| Location | Newcastle |
| Age | 0 |
| Cause of Death | Miscarriage |
| Date of Birth | 19/08/2009 |
| Date of Death | 19/08/2009 |
| Visitors | 431 since 31/08/2009 |
| Creator |
This is in memory of my angel boy Dylan Thomas!
I want to tell his story like his sisters!
When I found out I was pregnant with you I was a little suprised but I'd hoped for you! I kept it a total secret for two weeks then I couldn't hold it any longer! I told close friends and family and made sure I was stress free! I done everything right for you my only worry was that their was two of you again but my dating scan told me you were alone and healthy and that I was 10weeks! :) they treat the pregnancy high risk because of your sisters and I saw the midwife a lot! The docs still sent me for a 12 week scan to check on you they were worried about your head and told mummy she should have amniosethis to check on you! They thought you had a neural tube defect known as anencephaly! I was gutted but I never quite believed them I was sure you were ok you looked fine to me! Perfect in fact! So I carried on as normal for 5weeks because I was determined to enjoy my pregnancy! You made it so easy for me sure a bit of morning sickness but I didn't care! I craved cider though you little tinker! But couldn't stand the smell of beer weird huh! I didn't show until 12weeks you angel but then it sort of appeared over night! You were a little tinker at your scan though wouldn't move so we could get a proper look at you!
Stubborn just like mummy and camera shy like daddy :) anyway we shopped around for prices and decided what pram we wanted and cots etc...I was so happy when I passed
the 14week mark where I'd lost your sisters! At 15weeks we had the amnio but on the scan we could see your head clearly! There was nothing wrong but they did the amnio anyway just to be sure! mummy blew up your picture to show people! I was elated! I really believed this time was it :) I couldn't have been more ready scared about the birth like any mummy to be but I knew know matter what it would be worth it! Monday 17th August mummy had really bad tummy pains! There was no bleeding and the pain wasn't crampy like it is in miscarriage I went to the doctors who sent me to the hospital he said he didn't think there was anything wrong with you! Aunty Sam took mummy cuz Daddy was at work and Nanny was poorly! She sat with us in A&E for 6hours before coming up to the ward with us! It took ages to explain I was pregnant they didn't seem to be listening to mummy! Maybe if they had and scanned me that night perhaps...well I guess I'll never know but mummy needed pain relief so she had some but nothing that could harm you! You were my priority! Mummy would have gone through anything to keep you safe! They took mummy to gynecology to be looked after! Then 18th August at 11:45 I went for a scan and I saw straight away that your heart wasn't beating! I didn't hear the doctor talk to me I didn't need to I'd been here before all to recently! I was taken back to the ward and I had to decide what to do and how to bring you into this world! I called a friend and talked it through! I opted for the natural birth! So at 9pm that night I was induced and at 3am on the 19th August you were born I willed you to make a noise! I shook you gently as I held your tiny body desperately wanting to wake you up! You didnt wake up though! Only went cold in my arms you were so small and perfect you just came to soon! I held you tight and never wanted to let you go! I had to though! The doctors came and told me I would have to go to theatre that day to remove my apendix as they were about to burst! I kissed you one last time and laid you in the basket I talked to you! Do you remember? I told you you were my little prince and I was sorry I hadn't been able to keep you safe! you were so beautiful to me! The nurses took you away while I cried at sending my 3rd angel to heaven in less than a year! No one knows why for sure could have been because I was so poorly with my apendix my body couldn't cope! Could have been the amnio test there is a risk! There's little consolation in knowing the why's if I'm honest you,pheobe and ruby are all still gone! I will hold you again someday wait for me in heaven with the Angels and Great nanna! I will think of you all everyday even if it seems I'm moving on there's always a place in my heart reserved for you 3 only! My 2 princesses and my little prince! Play with the angels you were too good for this life! I love you with all my heart my little boy!
Dylan Thomas
Born sleeping at 16weeks!
Loved eternally
Mummy
Xxx
Guardian Angel from heaven so bright,
Watching beside me to lead me aright,
Fold thy wings round me, and guard me with love,
Softly sing songs to me of heaven above.
Amen.
Tiny Angels rest your wings
sit with me for awhile.
How I long to hold your hand,
And see your tender smile.
Tiny Angel, look at me,
I want this image clear....
That I will forget your precious face
Is my biggest fear.
Tiny Angel can you tell me,
Why you have gone away?
You weren't here for very long....
Why is it, you couldn't stay?
Tiny Angel shook his head,
"These things I do not know....
But I do know that you love me,
And that I love you so".
Hoping your family have a happy New Year
With love
Hayden's nannie
In a baby castle, just beyond your eye,
Your baby plays with angel toys that money cannot buy.
Who are you to wish him back into this world of strife,
No, play on your baby, they'll have eternal life.
At night when all is silent and sleep forsakes your eyes,
You'll hear their tiny footsteps come running to your side
Their little hands caress you so tenderly and sweet,
You'll breathe a prayer and close your eyes and embrace them in your sleep.
Now you have a treasure that you rate above all others
You have known true glory,
You are still their mother.
happy 1st Birthday...
Though it seems like everyone else has forgotten i remember my Angel...i remember like it was yesterday! Happy Birthday baby im sorry i cant spend it with you....i still think of you always! Im sending floaty angel kisses and i hope you have a huge birthday party with the other angels! Mummy is trying not to be sad today but its very hard becauase i still dont understand why you had to go when i would hve loved you so! Yoiur just too special for this world and one day i will witness it myself your a little miracle you were just a borrowed Angel...heaven needed you back.... :'(
Love and thoughts are sent to you today and always....
your heart broken
xxxMUMMYxxx
The world may never notice
If a Snowdrop doesn't bloom,
Or even pause to wonder
If the petals fall too soon.
But every life that ever forms,
Or ever comes to be,
Touches the world in some small way
For all eternity.
The little one we longed for
Was swiftly here and gone.
But the love that was then planted
Is a light that still shines on.
And though our arms are empty,
Our hearts know what to do.
Every beating of our hearts
Says that we love you.
Time has taken me from you,
Although not very far.
I'll be watching through the sunshine
And through the brightest star.
I'll be watching all of you,
From the heavens up above.
So take good care of each other
And carry all my love.
If you're ever wondering
If I'm there, here's where you can start.
Take a look inside yourself
Deep within your heart.
I'll always be your baby,
Your child (grandchild), your best friend.
So anytime you need me,
Close your eyes I'm back again.
"For My Unborn Child"
by Marigrace Iodice
I never got to see your face
Or even give you a name
But in my heart, you hold a special place
And for that, I would never be the same
I'll never hear you laugh or cry
Or hold you in my arms tenderly
I'll never know the color of your eyes
But I will still love you endlessly
I never got to hold your hand
I never got to sing you a lullaby
I will never come to understand
Why murderers run free & innocent souls die
I'll always have my suspicions
Why God took you from me
All these unanswered questions
That would burn inside of me
Forever saddened upon this Earth
Crying for you, my unborn child
Never blessed by your birth.
But I'll be here, Unable to smile
You are my shining light in heaven
For One of God's Angels to love
Until I get my wings to descend
She'll take care of you, for me, in Heaven above
You'll be my Guiding Light to Heaven's Gate
Where I'll get to see your Angelic Smile
And even if I never got to see your face
I'll know in an instant that you are my unborn child!
In a baby castle, just beyond your eye,
Your baby plays with angel toys that money cannot buy.
Who are you to wish him back into this world of strife,
No, play on your baby, they'll have eternal life.
At night when all is silent and sleep forsakes your eyes,
You'll hear their tiny footsteps come running to your side
Their little hands caress you so tenderly and sweet,
You'll breathe a prayer and close your eyes and embrace them in your sleep.
Now you have a treasure that you rate above all others
You have known true glory,
You are still their mother.
But Jesus called the children to him and said, "Let the little children come to me, and do not hinder them, for the kingdom of God belongs to such as these. I tell you the truth, anyone who will not receive the kingdom of God like a little child will never enter it."
xxxxx
Hills & Valleys
© Sue Morton
The hills, the valleys
and the bends.
Going up and down each day,
wondering if my heart will mend.
Sure, the pain will lessen
and I'll genuinely smile once more
but the emptiness will stay
and my heart will forever be sore.
You were all I ever wanted
and now you'll never be.
You were going to be my future
now that has ceased for me.
I can't help this feeling
of feeling so alone,
but I just can't talk about it
I don't want to be a moan.
So I'll keep writing
and talking to you in my mind.
Until we meet one day
and then true joy I will find.
I'm not saying
it's going to be soon,
even if it's years from now
my joy will be over the moon
God needed an angel in heaven
When Jesus lived upon the earth so many years ago,
He called the children close to him because he loved them so.....
And with that tenderness of old, that same sweet, gentle way,
He holds your little loved one close within his arms today.....
And you’ll find comfort in your faith that in his home above
The God of little children gives your little one his love....
So think of you little darling lighthearted and happy and free
Playing in God’s promised land where there is joy eternally.
Helen Steiner Rice
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